Raising boys (and girls) is not for the faint of heart.

IMG_0622I spent the morning holding my son in my lap as he wept – crying over the fact that he is in the lowest reading group in his class. My heart breaks for him. Of course, there is nothing wrong with him. Yes, reading is a struggle, right now. He is learning and working hard, and that is what matters most. But, how do I convince him of that?

There is something wrong with our school system which rushes our children to learn at warp speed, pressuring them with tests and homework and “reading acceleration”. He is seven – and from everything I have read, it is totally normal for a seven-year-old boy to not yet be reading proficiently. In fact, in Finland, one of the most intelligent countries in the world, children are given a free pass to read at their own pace until the age of 7.  According to Peg Tyre’s research in her book “The Trouble with Boys” {Bad title, but a great read!}, it is more important for boys to feel successful in the early years of school than it is for them to meet specific academic standards, so that they enjoy school and to stay motivated to learn.

What is the point of pushing a child so hard that he perceives school as bad and himself as incapable!

I will be watching and monitoring this. I will be hovering, even if I am perceived as a “helicopter parent”.

This child is a child of God, made in His image, given talents and skills others do not possess. He is a Child of God created for a Greater Purpose.

On this I will meditate today, as I pray for guidance, wisdom, and courage to fight and advocate for him. All the while doing my best to lift him up and encourage him to make him believe that He is capable, and good, and that school is meant for good.

I read this article today posted by a friend. She is the mother of four, three of them being boys.

It is worth your time…..I covet your prayers for my sweet boy. May he feel successful, strong, and capable today, just as God created him to be.

Here is the link for the article. {link}I am eager to read your response.

purposed for motherhood,


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6 thoughts on “Raising boys (and girls) is not for the faint of heart.

  1. Jana,

    So many thoughts on this one…..I’ll be praying that God guides you, Mike and Charlie in this situation in a way that only He can.

  2. Jana, I am proud that you are your son’s advocate; most parents just accept the school’s view of their children.
    What happened to the school days of trips to museums and historical places, of creating as a class? Now it seems to be all tests and competition among classmates; How sad!

    • Thank you, Teresa. I struggle because I do value the teachers and the expertise they have in teaching children, my children. I am not a teacher and trust that they are doing the best for my child. However, I am concerned that even well-meaning teachers have so much pressure put on them to achieve certain test scores and accolades for the schools they represent that they forget about the best interests of the children. I believe our children are getting caught in the cross-fire. So many of my friends are home-schooling because of this. I, however, have not sensed this calling and still have faith that it takes a village to raise my child – I want them to have the opportunity to learn from other teachers and adult mentors. I continue to pray and trust that God’s got this. Blessings to you and yours, Jana

  3. Oh, Jana. I’m sorry to here about sweet Charlie feeling down about school. I definitely agree that there is too much pressure on the young students.
    Don’t worry about being a “helicopter parent”. That term is only warranted when parents hover with no good reason except to know everything that is happening when nothing is really happening. You are your child’s advocate and that is exactly what you’re doing…advocating for your child. Hang in there girlfriend!

I would love to hear from you!