I am rejoicing today and happy to report, that my little guy is singing once again. He takes after his momma – he sings, blissfully unaware that others are listening, when he is content and at peace with himself and the world.
I was aware of his singing this morning as I drove him to school.
The past couple of months have been filled with worry, prayer, change, and purpose. My husband and I have been intentional about finding the right school environment for our youngest son. We tried the public school with its large class size and test oriented nature. We tried a month and a half of home-schooling. And, finally we tried the small, private Christian school in our town. We have found it to be the perfect fit!
It reminds me of the sweet children’s story of “Goldy Locks and the Three Bears”. She walks in the house only to find several choices. And, not until she tries every one does she in fact figure out which one fits her best.
The answers to our questions are not always clear. Choices take time to reveal themselves, and when they do, it may take some time to figure it all out.
We prayed, and struggled, and dialogued, and prayed some more trying to figure out what was best for our youngest. We wanted him in a school environment where he was seen for his God-given potential; we wanted him to be seen as a child who deserved someone to take the time to mold him with love and gentleness into the Godly man we know he will one day be. It broke my heart to watch him come home day after day beaten down by defeat, saddened and burdened by missing “the mark” once again.
He is now a little boy who is singing, uninhibited in the back seat of the car on the way to school! Praise God for answered prayer.
I have been silent here at jana’s three dresses because my heart and mind have been elsewhere. My heart, soul and mind have been silenced by my worries.
When the worries of this world press in on me, I find my soul bound – the place from which I write. I feel as though I am mute.
I cannot pen words that do no exist. I cannot find motivation or inspiration.
For this mother, it feels impossible at times.
I knew this day would come – even in the darkest moments when I thought I would never write again. I knew one day the bindings would release and my spirit would tap into His Spirit and bring forth fruit to share with others. Oh, how I have longed for this day to come!
Hence, in my silence I have been praying over this platform wondering where God would lead jana’s three dresses. He has given me some ideas. I hope to reveal them soon.
For now I will celebrate His love and care for the littles in my life. And, I will celebrate the song my son and I have both found once again.
You have turned for me my mourning into dancing; you have loosed my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness, that my glory may sing your praise and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks to you forever! (Psalm 30:11-12)